I Invite You to Learn 20 New Things About Me!

1. I am so bored at work, LOL. I know 911 dispatchers aren’t allowed to go on Facebook while on duty, but I don’t care because I’m so BORED!
2. I love my girlies! Hi girls, if you’re reading this you must be SO BORED too, LOL!
3. I am in a committed relationship with the love of my life, a little guy by the name of Jose Cuervo. LOL! JK! But not really because I’m actually desperately lonely!
4. I really love indie movies, like The Notebook! Hello, Ryan Gosling in the rain! So buff, yet so tender!
5. I drowned every one of my childhood hamsters in the bathtub! There were six of them total! I planted every one of them under the radiator and pretended to cry when my mom found it! I wailed with such conviction that she never even asked why it was wet she just bought me another one!
6. I love tank tops!
7. When I was a little girl, I really wanted to be one of those people who gives tours of the cheese factory.
8. Sometimes I LOL at things that I don’t even think are funny, just so I’ll fit in with my girlies.
9. I never ROTFL at things that I don’t think are funny, because I’m too strong willed.
10. My girlies and I were the Spice Girls for Halloween, and they made me be Scary because my hair is so frizzy! I was actually really offended!
11. I genuinely miss Gouda, hamster number five. I didn’t really want to drown him, but I was on such a roll.
12. One time at a New Years Eve party, I got confetti up my nose and it hurt so much I cried! And all my girls told me to stop whining that I didn’t have anyone to kiss at midnight, but it really was just the confetti pain!
13. Later that same night I got champagne up my nose, and the bubbles hurt so bad I thought I was actually dying! My girlies told me to stop freaking out just because I was jealous that they all had boyfriends this year and Hank had left me, but it really just was the bubbles!
14. I’ve resented them all ever since! You hear me guys? I hate you all!
15. I am a total Shopaholic. Guilty, as charged! And I like to charge – often! Now I’m thousands of dollars in debt!
16. I told my mom I buried Gouda in the back yard, but actually kept him in a Sketchers box under my bed for a few months! I poked holes in the lid and put hamster pellets in every day, because I refused to accept what I had done!
17. My favorite TV show is Aflac commercials!
18. I couldn’t live without my blackberry, or as I like to call it my crack-berry! Because it’s so addictive! I’m addicted to it, like crack!
19. Sometimes I feel like every day, everything I do and say is a total lie.
20. I think Tostitos Hint of Lime are a complete mid-afternoon lifesaver!